Journey in 78 Steps

What is Love? A Valentine's Day Reading

I wanted to post this before we got too far away from the day - I used the Lover's Path Tarot to ask the question "What is Love?" using the Four-Fold Vision Spread.

What is Love?

The object being viewed (Love):
7 of Coins

This card shows Love as slow growth - a parent caring and raising a child for the sake of a future she might never see... planting a tree which might not bear fruit until long after the planter is gone.  Love isn't about what you can do for me, but about me caring for you whether or not there is immediate return.  Love isn't about quick fixes or a strategy to get results, but is focused on the long range benefit to the one being loved.  "Love is patient".

Physical vision (how love is experienced at a mechanical/material level):
6 of Arrows

At the core level, Love creates a situation where life's challenges are easier to handle... it is seen as a method of traveling through life in such a way that difficulties are made easier, chaos is calmed, everything feels easier because one isn't thinking solely of themselves.  In this sense, I think Love is the boat - it matters less whether or not there is someone currently available on which to pour out one's love as it does that each of us can choose to journey through life in a loving way - being open to it is what carries us forward.

This is quite a bit different than how many people regard Love - they look for it, wonder when it will come to them rather than realizing have it with them always.  They tell themselves that Love is more 'real' according to how intense everything is, including anger and drama and feelings of insecurity.

There is a reminder here that Love leads to a sense of calm, not created drama... it exists to make life better, not more chaotic. 

Mental Vision (Love personified/perceived)
VI: Love

Ha! Love is... Love.  We see Love as the archetype of Love.  Here, that archetype is firmly shown in the camp of passionate love - Isis and Osiris, who battled and overcame everything including betrayal and Death for the sake of the love between them.  This is Love as warrior that will allow nothing to destroy it - Love with fierceness and great passion in it.

I don't think this is necessarily a contradiction to the 6 of Swords, though it is the grander vision that drives our daily journey.... Love doesn't let life's complications destroy it.. doesn't let the daily details come between those who love.  Love personified is stronger than the life in which it lives... as long as let that boat carry us, we don't get bogged down by momentary problems.

Emotional Vision (how passions are stimulated by mental vision):
XIV: Balance

Oh I do like this - Emotionally, Love is seen as a melding together - a blending together of those who love, so that each are uplifted and necessary and together they become something stronger than they were alone.  The couple shown here is Venus and Vulcan.. possibly the most mismatched couple in myth - water and fire, beauty and brawn.  By themselves, each has their own individual strengths and weaknesses... together they are able to lend strength the other lacks and operate as a balanced whole.  They don't disappear into the other - each remains a unique individual while evolving together into One.

Mystical Vision (unseen aspects of the object):
III: Fertility, rx

This returns to the message of the first card - Love is a generative act... its purpose is to create, whether that be creating babies or aiding the growth of the one that is love.. or through art or other forms of doing... Love isn't a feeling, it is a verb - Love manifests itself in real and concrete ways.

The reversal here is a reminder that when one loves, they are planting seeds within themselves... there is internal growth that takes place.  So as we plant the seeds outwardly, knowing we might never see the results - as we travel through out lives in a way that Love carries us through our difficulties.. as we fight for the sake of Love and let nothing harm it or turn us aside from the path.. as we let Love connect us to others who can make us stronger than we can be on our own... Love grows within us, the generative qualities of Love take root within ourselves and it becomes an essential aspect of who we are.

All together the root of this reading seems to be that... to not live in such a way that one protects against love or fears it - but to live it, fullheartedly and that as we do so, it gets easier to understand why we should.

Daily Draw - 6 of Swords

This card shows a nude male figure with a  bull's head navigating a small wooden boat with  a sail.  The boat  is a curved  crescent shape (lunar) with  a raised  section with a railing to serve as the boatman's  seat. 

The bull is navigating  by way of a  round  horizontal wheel that is separated into 8 sections by spokes - this wheel reminds me very much of the  Wheel of the Year or Wheel of Fortune.

The white sail is full of wind coming from behind, generating forward movement.  The mast holding up the sail is a living tree with bare limbs.

The sky above is dark with thick grey clouds, while the lower background behind the boat is composed of blinding white light that obscures the terrain.  The water beneath is moving the boat forward in soft swelling waves.

Overhead there are six swords - four laid out horizonatally, pointed toward the direction in which the boat is traveling, and 2 that are woven through the ends of the horizontal swords, points up.

The key aspects of this card that strike me is the bull man, which reminds me of Taurus and a movement toward comfort.  This seems to stem from navigating lunar receptivity (the boat) by way of paying attention to cycles of change (the wheel) and using the energy that comes from the Tree of Life (the mast that holds the sails)... it's a gentle sort of movement that comes more from accepting the tides of change and looking ahead rather than forcibly pushing through uncomfortable periods of life.

On a daily level, today it speaks of recovery from a mild state of illness... last night, I had another very bad sinus headache that turned into stomach trouble, making for extreme discomfort (bad headaches make me nauseated).  This is the second time I've had to deal with this in a month, and it's certainly seasonal-based.  It's mostly passed today, though there is still a shadow-headache, and general lack of appetite.  But I am navigating beyond it, and aware that it's simply something to deal with and get over.

ETA:  I looked up the book notes on this image and find it comes from a work entitled "Allegory of a Wolf and Eagle" and the figure here is supposed to be a wolf-man.  A lone wolf navigating his little boat... it puts a rather different spin on this, but try as I might, that still looks like a bovine face, not a wolf.

Stalked by Mother Nature

Wotta week.  Last night, my friend M and I made it back from what turned out to be a very difficult trip to DC.  I'm not sure how much notice the weather news got outside of the DC area, but it was baad.

(I drew a trio of cards and am laughing at how it tells the tale - I can laugh now that it's done!)

On Wednesday, M and I left for what should have been a 4.5 hour drive - I had a doctor's appointment out there on Thursday, so the plan was to head out on Wednesday, then M would drop me off at the hospital on Thursday while he went to work, pick me up after and on Friday I'd hang at his house and we'd head back home here on Saturday. 

The 6 of Swords describes the purpose of the trip - to get back on a medication and care program that would ease up some of the pain and loss of functionality I've had the last few months.  Good plan, eh?  Here we see Orestes making a  trip toward peace... should've been smooth sailing and the result of course was to secure  a calmer future.

Unfortunately, the drive took more than 8 hours and it was rainy the entire way - and it turns out we were driving in the wake of a major storm that began in the Ohio Valley, blew through WV (and overtook us in Frostburg, where it dumped a firehose-worth of rain on us when we'd stopped to get something to eat), and went on to make mincemeat out of DC's commuter traffic.  By the time we made it to the area, traffic was at a total standstill, street lights all over the region were out, and it took us as long to crawl around the loop as it did to get there from my front door.

Turns out, we didn't even realize the half of it.  When we got to M's house, a tree (a very healthy, old, vibrant tree) had been torn up by its roots and was laying across the street (fortunately hitting no one's house or car), right on top of the power lines - no power to the neighborhood, of course.  We were tired, wet and hungry, so we dropped off our stuff and went to look for food - figuring we'd drive til we found somewhere with lights on and then pick a restaurant.

Off we went and found an area that looked lit up and normal, flipped on the radio and heard "...immediately take shelter. If you do not have a basement, get into the bathtub.  Again, if you are in the (exact area where we were), take shelter IMMEDIATELY - this is a fast moving tornado and will he hitting in the next couple of minutes."

ERK!  With no time to think and no bathtubs in the car to take shelter in, we ducked into the parking lot next to us and decided to go into the restaurant there (hey, there were limited options), hoping not to sit near a window.  The sky was pretty freaky for the next 20 minutes or so, but no tornado, at least not where we were.

After that, the weather was over and it was just the aftermath. ("Just" she says...)  There were a quarter million people without power, downed trees everywhere and radio announcers calling what had happened before we arrived as a 'gustado' - a tornado level blast of wind that just punches through an area without the spinning action of a tornado.  And the weather for the next few days?

  Hot, hot, hot and humid to match - upper nineties for both temperature and humidity. The power company was working at breakneck speed to get power back on, but with all the downed trees it was complicated work and they're still at it now.  They called in help from multiple surrounding states and meanwhile, everyone sweated, food in refrigerators went bad, and the ever bad traffic situation in the are continued to be bad.

With no power on, there was also no coffee, and no warm water for showers (and in spite of the heat, a cold shower does my arthritis no good - and the humidity was already making me miserable enough), and on Thursday, we headed up to the hospital for what I'd already known was going to be a difficult day.  (Boredom is the real killer).

No need to go into all that - I was lugging medical records, a book to read and left with those plus a lot of meds, and braved the Metro to meet up with  M after he got off work and the heat was oppressive.

Friday, was more of the same, only at the house... no power, hot, able to read but bored (the heat was too much to really pay attention to anything 'deep' and by now it was impossible to keep drinks cool or otherwise ease the sticky hotness.  Around 4pm, the power people showed up and began working  and yay! About 3 hours later there was power again - the tree was also still across the yard, so M's got that to sort out - but power! Electricity is a beautiful thing.

Saturday, we both lazed about a bit before heading back to my area - and I was very ready to head home.  There were still a lot of areas without power, and the temperatures were over 100F in DC. But the drive back was much easier than the trip back had been.  We made a stop at M's office to pick up meds of mine he'd put in a fridge there (that was another challenge - very expensive injectables that had to be kept cool in a situation with no power!) and drove west.

And there, I was greeted with a wonderful surprise - my marvelous children, even not being in much communication with me (no power quickly meant no phone access as he has a wireless landline and the cell went dead and couldn't be recharged), they'd decided to surprise me by cleaning the house top to bottom, and had dinner waiting when we arrived. 

Home, great kids, coffee and AC and it's a beautiful day today (hot, muggy, but nearly as oppressive as it is out in DC).  And life is good.

New Moon in Taurus Reading

Before I put the Goddess Tarot away, I wanted to do a reading with it.  I totally neglected to observe Beltane last week, but today the New Moon in Taurus is here, and with that brings up issues of security, comfort and abundance... and it so happens that Christine Jette's Beltane spread (The May Queen) is devoted to those concerns.

Safety
VIII - Justice
This was the card I drew yesterday and it speaks well to the way I draw a sense of safety to myself - the ability to analyse and understand a potentially unsafe situation, and pool resources in a way so that no one person is left to take the hit alone is the primary way I currently find safety in an otherwise precarious life. 

In terms of where this points me this next month, I will want to focus on establishing my safety by not living in ignorance of what is going on - the more I understand, the safer I am, and that means looking into a few paperwork details I've been procrastinating about, mainly because I've been afraid of finding out something negative I can't deal with.  Pretty dumb - I can't deal with what I don't know about, either.

Abundance
6 of Swords
Currently, my sense of abundance springs less from having and more from experiencing life as a progression toward stability.  It matters less where I am at the moment than which direction I'm heading.  There's a sense of intention about this card - not giving up but taking one's ideas and moving them to a more favorable place in which to use them.  I am taking babysteps right now toward a sense of abundance, and have done quite a bit of alteration in my thinking about what makes up 'abundance'... and this is the key thing I've realized.  It's not so much a goal to be reached as a journey to be taken, and it requires getting some focus on what is important to retain and what is best left behind. "Tis a gift to be simple" comes to mind here.

In terms of where this points me this next month, I believe the I need to do some sorting of my 'stuff', material as well as my ideas about abundance and do some releasing of those things that are no longer serving me... travel lighter but start looking ahead.  I need to do some spring cleaning in earnest in my home, get rid of things that are holding me back from abundance (clutter is not a sign of abundance! It's a sign of fear of loss!) and leave some room in the boat for those  things that truly make me feel prosperous.  I also need to sit down and do some regrouping on my financial plan and make sure that I'm not lugging along baggage I don't need merely out of habit.

Regeneration
XVI - Oppression
This is an odd image for the Tower card - it depicts the Wawalak, which is described in the LWB as Australian aboriginal goddesses who are swallowed whole by the Great Rainbow Serpent and are 'oppressed by darkness' until they are reborn back into the light.  The Tower (and Chariot) is my Life Purpose card so I've gotten used to... so the message here is as it involves regeneration is that those dark moments where everything seems to be falling apart are a necessary part of growth for me - they serve a purpose however unsettling it seems at the time. 

I feel much less these days as if I'm living in an eternally falling Tower (or belly of a giant snake), but moments like the car breaking down just as I thought I'd get a bit in front of expenses felt that way... but only briefly.  And ultimately, having it go allowed us to know it needed to be fixed, so that's a bit of regeneration right there, isn't it?  If the belt hadn't gone, we might not have realized the problem with the water pump, and I think that might have led to a much worse situation down the road.

In terms of where this points me this next month, I think this feeds into what else this reading has pointed to - I need to be open to experiencing sudden alterations in my plans and habits as opportunities for revelation that can lead to freedom from oppression.  This version of the card depicts the moment before that breakthrough where things seem stagnate and hopeless... the Tower isn't a fortress that protects, it's a prison.  Remembering that, I can try to see upheavals as birth-pangs leading to regeneration and a new outlook that opens the path to greater freedom.

Love
7 of Pentacles
In terms of my primary relationships, things are steady and developing - there is slow, organic growth here and not much going on on the surface... things on on cruise and neither need or would be helped by a lot of hands on fiddling.

This is a simple Taurean 'don't fix it if it ain't broke' idea and a reminder to relax and enjoy things as they are without rushing to make it something else.  The 7 also speaks about taking time out to appreciate the value of my relationships and not mistake peace for stagnation.

In terms of where this points me this next month, I will make sure to show my appreciation often and not wait for big events to spur me to remember to say thank you and I love you to those in my life.

Future
9 of Pentacles
And here's a nice vision for the future.. a woman who is stable, happy and independent.  As I deal with prosperity and comfort related issues this month, I will hold this image in mind and remember that this is where I am wanting to be.  Each step toward it is a step in the right direction.

In terms of where this points me this next month, I will devote some time to doing what I mentioned above, keeping in mind the bigger picture and ultimate goal.  I'll work to eliminate dependence on those things that don't lead me to this happy domestic stability, and again, appreciate each step along the way.

In practical terms, I want to spend this month eliminating clutter, realigning my spending to what creates a stable, welcoming home, devote more time to meal planning that targets cost savings, nutrition and aesthetics (finding enjoyable 'comfort meals') and working to simplify our living habits in such a way that we alter our views on what abundance is - not more, but more enjoyment with less.  And I want to make these changes not to ride out a tight time, but to create new habits that will take us into the future feeling secure and prosperous without being utterly dependent on money to do so.